Meditation Monday - Silly Filly

I'll bet you're wondering what on earth this title is all about. Late last year, God spoke to me from a portion of His word:

Then I realized that my heart was bitter, and I was all torn up inside. I was so foolish and ignorant — I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you. Yet I still belong to you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny. Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth. My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; He is mine forever. ~ Psalm 73:21-26

One translation says 'I must have seemed like a foolish horse to You.' And for whatever reason I named it the 'silly filly' verse and God reminded me of it occassionally when I needed His discipline...when my heart was bitter and I wasn't forgiving. This morning I had to forgive again, and remind myself that God remains the strength of my heart. That He is mine forever. I'm not in this on my own. I don't have to do it alone. More than anyone, God knows what it's like to be hurt, to feel angry and betrayed. He knows what it is to forgive.

I had to remind myself about some points from Wednesday night.

This last week, friends of ours from YWAM Jeffreys Bay came to share with our discipleship group. They spoke to us about forgiveness. This is a huge topic that needs to be revisited again and again but it was a really good way to get us thinking and talking about it.

For some, it opened old wounds that hadn't healed, and where we'd not forgiven. I'd felt peaceful on the night, but this morning I realised that I was hearing the silly filly verse in my head again. I'd been sharing my experience with two close girl friends and as I spoke the words that had been the most hurtful and 'framed' the experience for me, I realised again why I tell folks not to let those painful words run like a stuck record through your mind. Capture those thoughts as they start and think of something that reminds you that you're thankful to God for His goodness.
When we don't forgive and we work ourselves up over something, it can turn into bitterness or even a desire for revenge, which we talked about on Thursday, here on The Vine. God has a great deal to say about bitterness and unforgiveness in His word. We'll look a little more at that down the line.

Some things about forgiveness:

> is not a feeling, it's an act of the will.
> is a once off and then again each time you're reminded of the hurt. Something like 'keep on keeping on'.
> doesn't mean that the person or organisation know or understand what they did to hurt you. For example, Jesus prays from the cross “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” Luke 23
> sets YOU free.
> allows you to be forgiven by God, too. "Forgive us our sins as we forgive those that sin against us." Luke 11:1-4
> doesn't mean that trust or healing happens instantly.

Hmnn...lots to ponder. We'll be back at this subject soon, I'm sure. Have a great Monday!